“Why in the world would you DO that to your hair?”

“That doesn’t ‘fit’ you”

“All that pretty hair…what a waste!”

“Your hair used to be so pretty”

Believe it or not, all of those are statements I have heard from people, in one form or another, when I decided to lock my hair as well as my daughters’ hair. It can be very disheartening when people make such comments and even more so, when the remarks are coming from people you love – family members, close friends, a spouse or lover.

So what do you do…how do you handle it?

A lot of people end up not getting the locs at all. Others decide to totally overlook the negativity of others and do what is in their hearts. But some have actually gone as far as to get divorced and sever close relationships over it because the tension and the arguing got to be too much due to how strongly each party involved feels about their position.

What’s my advice?

It really all depends. It depends on the level of your relationship with the individual(s) involved for example:  I personally would NOT advise divorcing or even allowing major friction between you and your spouse over a hair style.

I would, however, present as much information as possible and really let the spouse know how important this is to you. The same goes for any other close loved ones who show disdain for your locked hair.

Now don’t get me wrong, in most cases you do NOT need to explain anything to anyone nor gain their approval. I mean, as much as I love and respect my mother in-law, when she and some of my other in-laws expressed disapproval for me locking my hair and ESPECIALLY my childrens’ hair, I did not try reasoning with them. I simply continued on with it and eventually the comments stopped…at least in my presence.

But there will always be those with opposing views and usually it is due to ignorance about locked hair and the locking process in general. Education played a huge factor in my husband changing HIS mind about locking my daughter’s hair and ultimately, he ended up getting locs himself!

In closing…

Your relationship with the opposing person will determine your reaction as well as your action. Again, if the opposing person is a spouse/partner, simply share how much your choice to lock means to you as well as information to inform them and possibly clear up and dispel any misconceptions and/or hang-ups they may have. But in the end, the decision is ultimately yours to make as to how you will handle the situation.

If you are the recipient of negativity towards locking your hair OR if you are the one inflicting the negativity on someone else but want to have a better understanding of locs and locking, sign up or invite someone else to sign up for my Free Dreadlock Myths Exposed Course where many common myths and misconceptions are addressed.

I recently did an interview with Tanya Ortiz of AllNaturalSoapStore.com asking what the big deal is about using their castile, all natural soaps.  The interview proved very interesting and enlightening as she revealed some things that you may (or may not) have known about soap, so-called “baby shampoos” and more!

Turn up your speakers and listen to this informative interview:

In this interview you will discover:

• Why bar soaps from your store may not be getting your totally clean
• The alarming reason commercial baby shampoo is “no more tears” that has nothing to do with how mild or gentle it is
• Some surprising uses for this castile all natural soaps plus a recipe for one of them
• Why not all castile soaps are created equally

I know I’m months late because I’m not much of a TV watcher and especially talk shows.  But I recently stumbled upon the YouTube videos of the Tyra Banks Show where she had a panel of guests discussing what “good hair” is.

At first I didn’t want to watch the show because I knew there would be something and/or someone that would anger me.  And I was absolutely correct!  However I’m GLAD I watched the show because it just confirmed and reinforced everything that was within me when I wrote the book, “Her Special Hair“.

I believe a lot of people feel that HSH is merely a “how to take care of your daughter’s hair” guide and while it is, it’s  much more because I touch on the whole mindset thing and how moms are, in part, the ones who shape and mold and set the trend for how their daughters will view their hair.  But I also learned that it doesn’t always come from mom…that sometimes mom is trying to teach her daughter that her natural hair is beautiful but kids at school, other relatives and peers in general have a role as well.

Here is an excerpt from Her Special Hair where I delved a bit into the whole “good hair/bad hair” thing…

“When I was a little girl, light-skinned girls with soft, wavy or very loosely curled hair were both admired and hated at the same time by their darker-skinned, “kinky-haired” counterparts. Those curly, soft, shiny tresses were very much desired by those of us who had “nappy” hair. I can remember imaging how wonderful it  must be to have hair like that…no pain when getting it combed, no burns from the pressing comb…I’d have pretty hair and all the boys would like me. Imagine feeling that way as a child and what an impact that has on a young girl growing up!  If you’re the parent of a little girl with loosely curled or wavy hair, you may have heard people refer to her hair as “good hair” or maybe you have referred to it as such yourself. But, what exactly does that mean? It was always thought that if you had hair like that, you had to be “mixed” or as we call it today, Biracial or Multi-Cultural. It was also thought that if you were “mixed” you would always have hair as previously described. But, as I got older and especially once I got into the hair profession, I discovered that the children of interracial parents did not always end up with loosely curled or wavy hair. Sometimes the hair will end up very kinky and/or coarse in texture. Once this happens, a big question mark appears in the mother’s mind as to what to do with it.”

In case you have not seen the show, I have posted the videos here:
http://naturalhaircarebooks.com/videos/tyra-banks-talks-hair-what-is-good-hair

These videos are of the  Tyra Banks Show – ”What Is Good Hair?” (Recorded May 12, 2009)

Very interesting but nothing new.  The book that was referenced and whose authors were guests on the show is the same book I have been telling people for years that they need to read is: “Hair Story : Untangling the Roots of Black Hair in America”

The Tyra Banks “What Is Good Hair?” Show – Part 1

The Tyra Banks “What Is Good Hair?” Show – Part 2

The Tyra Banks “What Is Good Hair?” Show – Part 3

The Tyra Banks “What Is Good Hair?” Show – Part 4

The Tyra Banks “What Is Good Hair?” Show – Part 5

Of all the natural hair shirt designs I’ve created, the “Everything God Created is Good…” design sells like hotcakes! And I can definitely understand why…the message is a very POWERFUL one!

Grab yours today and make YOUR declaration known loud and clear!
Click here to get this design in your desired style and size!

Some people are afraid to get Bradelocz because they see the present thickness of mine. They don’t necessarily want thick locks and so when they see how mine started out thin and are now thick, they tend to think that Bradelocz, period, get thicker overtime.

Not true! You’ll see in the video what happened and why my locs are now thicker than when I first began 8 years ago…

Here I answer some common questions about Bradelocz and the beginning/infant stages…

This is the result of the two-strand twists that I did with my locs a few days or so prior to filming this video…

So who says that getting locs means the end of versatility?

2-Styles-In-1 – Two-Strand Twists that will ultimately become a twist-out!

Simply twist two locs together and if need be, secure the ends with an inconspicuously-colored band or a loc-cuff.

I also have more basic styling tips for small-to-medium sized (and length) locs in my Bradelocz eBook guide

Desire to lock your hair but scared because of things you’ve heard, read or just conjured up in your mind about them?

If so, please subscribe to my FREE video course entitled, “Dreadlock Myths Exposed” located at http://dreadlockmythexposed.com

This free course will dispel myths and misconceptions about [dreadlocks] such as:

- Locks can’t be washed

- Locks are unattractive

- Locks aren’t professional

- Locks are ONLY reserved for people of a certain religion/culture

and more!

So watch this video introduction and then sign up for the free Dreadlock Myths Exposed video course and please be sure to use a VALID email address!